un/grateful

just a little pre-show warning: this blog post may not only be just really boring and full of drivel, but also rather gloomy. i'm sorry to be so down on a day when i should be really happy... it's just that this is my first Thanksgiving away from home. which really shouldn't be such a big deal, since i live in South Africa - which means we don't get the days off, and cooking all that food while juggling normal life is a schlep, so my family (which celebrates because my mom is American, in case you're wondering) usually has a smaller, condensed sort of celebration in lieu of a big, bold, extravagant affair.

but it's a celebration nonetheless.

it's just... weird not being home for Thanksgiving. and i'm incredibly homesick as it is - my heart's crying out to be back at home among its green hills. i have two more exams in the next two days and i'm struggling like anything to put my head down and study (which i REALLY need to do, trust me!) when all my mind can think about is getting on a plane on Sunday afternoon and flying back to where i belong.

and yet...

i'm not ungrateful. i've had a really decent day - studying through the morning, having my breath stolen by Walt Whitman and Allen Ginsberg, joking around with friends at lunch, an incredibly good exam {which, by the way, i had anticipated being really really awful... so its pleasantness was such a blessing}, shopping at Pick'n'Pay and seeing half of Rhodes doing the same (only in this town will you walk into the supermarket and see not only half of the people you just wrote an exam with, but the lecturer for whom you wrote the exam, as well as your faculty's Dean... all doing their grocery shopping. beautiful.), a Snickers bar, Flyleaf, a lift up the hill with Bronnie and Jarrod, dinner and peaches, Chris and baseball and turkey drawings, Kelsey and studying and Cadbury Wholenut chocolate, and long conversations about the things that frustrate and move us about America...

i had a really good day.

and i do love this town an incredible amount; i won't deny that a large part of my heart has come to live here and i'm sure will stay here when i go back to my original home in two days. yes, Grahamstown - this infinitely special little borough - has managed to worm its way into my heart and become a home for me.

i'm just indescribably worn out. and starting to panic about my exam tomorrow. and missing my mom and dad and cat. i guess it's just that time of the year.

i'm going to sleep now, so that i can wake up early in the morning and study my tail off for my first Xhosa exam, which i'm scheduled to write in the afternoon.

but if you're reading this (and i'm really sorry if you are, it's a terribly mopey and rambling blog post)...  
HAPPY THANKSGIVING!

i hope you are all safe and warm and happy and loved.

it's a kind of magic

i'm having a rather large amount of fun this afternoon. look:

:)

it may not always be so

it may not always be so;and i say

that if your lips,which i have loved,should touch

another's,and your dear strong fingers clutch

his heart,as mine in time not far away;

if on another's face your sweet hair lay

in such a silence as i know,or such

great writhing words as,uttering overmuch,

stand helplessly before the spirit at bay;

if this should be,i say if this should be-

you of my heart,send me a little word;

that i may go unto him,and take his hands,

saying,Accept all happiness from me.

Then shall i turn my face,and hear one bird

sing terribly afar in the lost lands.

(sweet edward estlin cummings, you are like a dream.)

even you must have a crush on you.

hello there, attractive-looking people.

they = The Life of Riley, Grahamstown's favourite band of all time.

they = incredibly talented and funny and stuff.

they = moving to Cape Town.

sad face.

i met Terri - Miss Vocalist - at another musical gig in the town of G... one of those rare times, you know. granted, it was Van Coke Cartel and Zebra & Giraffe, so the vibe was a little less, um, acoustic. with a little more moshing. first thought that passed through my head upon meeting Terri? jeez, this woman is lovely. and at that stage, i didn't even know she was famous and suchlike! which made her loveliness even more incredible when i look back on that night. ha. so nice to little pleb Hannah!

Nick - the guitarist-slash-glockenspielist - has already moved to Cape Town, so i only officially met him on Saturday night (more about that coming up). and since i knew he was famous beforehand, i was Little Miss Shy. aaaaack. but he seems to be rather nice, too :)

for some reason, Terri seems to like the band i'm in... i think it's mostly cause she and le Justin are homies from Welkom days ;) in any case, Terri is leaving Grahamstown at the end of the year and so Nick came down for One Final Show in our little var-city. and this took place on Saturday evening. and since Terri has decided that The Bad Hands are cool, we got to open for them.

um. i responded like the pineapple.

yes! really. aaaah. talk about being nervous. because, hello, these people are brilliant at life, and at what they do. and they make Justin, Clarke and me look like little children messing around on stage. especially me. yikes.

nevertheless, the gig happened. and we played, and *hem hem* we weren't amazing, i won't lie. we were average ;) the sound wasn't on our side for a bit of the time, and i messed up cause it.was.a.new.venue.aaah.why.so.many.eyes.on.meeee, and not as many people laughed at our unplanned, offbeat jokes as usually do. but we had fun, and we laughed, and we felt mighty honoured to be playing before The Life of Riley.

then Dani Bowler played some of her swaggalicious music while i dined on Simba chips and Coca-Cola (yes, i'm healthy - go away.) and then it was finally time for THE LIFE OF RILEY. yaaaah.

firstly, before i talk about how epic they were - and they were, don't you worry - can we mourn the fact that this was my very first Life of Riley gig of all time? they only played one other gig this year, and i heard about it after the fact. (on the night, but after they'd played. unhappy Hannah was unhappy.) and, you know, this being my first year of varsity and all, i kind-of wasn't around for all their gigs prior to this year. sigh. i cannot believe i missed out on so many shows of goodness. but i will look on the bright side and be grateful that i was at THIS show! yeah. so grateful. so so grateful.

because, like i mentioned, they were fantabulous. i did some crazy fan-girl dancing, was right up in front, squealed like a 14-year-old and sang along as loud as i could when i remembered the lyrics to their songs. with lyrics like,

"even you must have a crush on you

cause you know all the things to say and all the right things to do..."

...well, singing along is rather dreamy. i also managed to grab the piece of paper on which was scrawled the lyrics to their New Song when Terri was done singing along to 'em, and so Cats' Eyes (which is what i deem it should be called) now has a position of pride on my cupboard door.

and then, as their last encore (as if life couldn't get any better) they played a cover of Mario's "Let Me Love You". yes, you know the one. the one we all used to jam to in our primary school uniforms. i don't even lie - i remember it well. i'd borrowed the CD from a friend who lived out of town, and i used to bring it to school. another friend would bring her CD Walkman (those things were tight back in the day, yo) and we'd jam to Mario during breaks. (the CD eventually got stolen from my bag, in case you were wondering. fond memories much?) and i'm gonna post the music video here just for kicks... because these moves used to be smooth. and i think that's hilarious.

regardless, The Life of Riley covered this song as their encore to their encore to their encore. (count the encores... THREE.) and i swear, i was 12 years old again. woah now. waaaaay better than the original? you betcha! as if the rest of the set didn't already have me weeping with delight, i was inconsolably happy after that last last song. and if that all sounds remarkably oxymoronic, it probably is, and we're going to move on now.

Dearest Life of Riley... i believe you are rather remarkable. i believe i will sorely miss your presence in beloved Grahamstown. i believe i will have to travel to Cape Town in order to get a fix of LOR-ness. if there's one thing that i still cannot believe, it's that our silly little band opened for you.

i love y'all.

and that is the truth.

let's be happy!

admittedly, i haven't had a great fourth term.

my res nearly caught fire on my first day back; my rugby team lost the final of the Currie Cup. work didn't ever end. i experienced my first break-up... um, i'm not dating again for a WHILE, thankyouverymuch. (i still love the boy, by the way... but let's save that story for another day, shall we?) we lost Matty and that most certainly hurt.

to top it all off, my final exams start on Monday and i feel like a complete blob - studying just does not agree with me.

but i don't feel like being glum - i really don't! so i'm cranking up the Taylor Swift/Owl City playlist on my laptop and i'm going to talk about all the GOOD things that happened this term - all the things that made me grin like mad :)

how about CHURCH? hi, Frontiers. thank you for being a home to me. i officially joined children's ministry this term, working with the littlies (3-5 year-olds) and i LOVE LOVE LOVE it :) we had a huge, fabulous launch of our new kid's ministry programme, which is called JOG (which stands for Jesus Our God) and i got to be a part of a little skit we put together... aaah, good times :) i feel so blessed to be a part of this family, where the love of God is evident, abundant, overflowing. tomorrow i officially become a member... so unbelievably happy :)

a scene from our skit. epic.

what else has been amazing about this term? well, my band. we're called The Bad Hands and we're pretty awesome, if i say so myself ;) this term has been great in terms of gigs - we played as a part of an acoustic competition and were narrowly beaten in the finals by the beautiful Miss Dani Bowler, and we also played a gig called Singing For Soup, a cool fundraiser type thing. we've been in the paper, we were interviewed on the radio... we've basically had a blast. Justin, Clarke and Mike [our manager] are true homies, and The Bad Hands has definitely been a highlight of this term :) (that sentence sounds so grammatically incorrect... ugh.)

YAYBADHANDS! :)

it's also been a birthday term! my sister Sindi celebrated her 21st late last month, and so we had an incredible picnic to celebrate the fantasticness that is her... i have no photos of that to share with you yet, but trust that it was fun of large proportions :)
then, 2 of my 3 best friends here at varsity had their birthdays - Sarah Bear turned 19 (!), so we had a little bit of fun time...

me, Pam and Sarah

Duncan and Robyn like the music...?

erm...

our side of the table won at coolness. and yes, that's my laptop open in front of me... do NOT judge. (me, Darsha and Duncan)

yep, that was a really great night :)

then Miss Pammy turned 21, so we had to go big! it involved stickers, pink, lunatic faces and crazy fun. observe:

me and the princess at breakfast Part 1

and Part 2...

...and Part 3 :)

Pam and her cake

Tshego, Pam, Janine the Pink Unicorn and Robyn

Robyn, Duncan, moi and Sarah

Sean, Sarah and Pam

Andrew and Tshego... um, yes, ANDREW WAS DANCING! it is a good thing to behold :)

so... all in all, another awesome night out. and that concludes the birthday section of this blog post ;) [stay tuned for Robyn's birthday, though - it's in less than 2 weeks! WOOT :)]

kay, i'm sure there was other cool stuff that happened this term, i really am sure, but i've forgotten all of it - so DON'T JUDGE... ;) there's another especially cool thing that happened just recently, but i'll post about it after i've written this crappy paper on Monday. because it warrants its own blog post, it is really THAT COOL :) mmkay? mmkay.

now i'm going to pretend to study for another hour till i have band practice and then - HEY PRESTO! - another gig which promises to be all kinds of beautiful :) stay lovely, everyone - and STAY TUNED!

heartsore.

{ i guess we're all one phone call from our knees }

i'm bone-tired, soul-tired tonight, but i cannot sleep. i know i haven't posted in a while and i wish i could write a witty post to break the silence... but i can't. instead, i have to spew half-angry, half-heartbroken, entirely painful and wondering words. this is catharsis in its truest form, so if you don't feel like seeing my guts spilled out on this site, i would advise you to stop reading now.

we lost dear Matty yesterday. and suicide is sickening.

in some deluded, hurtful moments in my past, i've wondered what it would feel like to lose someone this way. the pain would be nothing short of incredible, i imagined. the plaguing doubt. the constant wish to go back, to take things back, to change something - anything.

all true.

i wasn't Matty's closest friend by a long shot, but i knew him. of our four BA subjects, we shared three; he lived in one of my brother resses and we would joke around when we ran into one another, which happened fairly regularly.

i remember "it's the beard, isn't it?" and the wisecracks that followed that comment.

i remember that the last thing he ever said to me was,

"INTERVISITING! YOU'RE GOING TO GET HOURS!"

and i will always remember the feeling of falling when i heard. like gravity had gone crazy. like the earth had spun off its axis and was hurtling wildly into the universe.

and i wasn't even that close to him.

i feel physically sick inside when i try to comprehend how his boys, his family, his friends, his Jess must be right now. i hurt so deeply for them. because if i feel like this, and i wasn't even that close to him, then the pain they are feeling must be worse than i could have ever imagined. unbearable, even.

there is another part of me that is just downright furious. with us, with him. with whatever triggered this, with the build-up, the breakdown, the final straw. i am unbelievably angry that this happened, frustrated and desperate for it not to be true. it is too terrible to be real. it could not have really happened...

but it did.

and i can't change that.

and it makes me sick.

please... if you're feeling alone or hopeless - you aren't. there is always a better answer, a new page. this has put a lot of... well... for lack of a better word, stuff in perspective for me. something that it's affirmed is that it is important to surround yourself with people who love you. i'm not saying Matty wasn't - i know that his friends were his brothers, i know that they were close and that they are now hurting like hell. but they have each other. and i know that i have people i can fall back on. i've learnt that it's vital to tell people you love them. it's infinitely important that they know this. love is a shock of air for weary lungs. it is breath. i will venture so far as to say that love is LIFE. i have found that it is okay to hurt. but it is also so necessary for you to share that hurt, not to carry it yourself and let it compound and build up inside you until you can't take it any more. i don't know if that's what happened to Matty, but i know that living that way must be absolute hell. i can imagine how death would seem like a viable escape from the build-up of so much inside. hurting is something we do, but we were never meant to carry it alone. and - i'm going to get preachy, prepare yourselves - even if there aren't people around you to help you bear your burdens (and there always are), we have a Father who is desperate to hold us, to help us, to carry us - a Father who cries, "Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest."

i don't know how to end this; i have no meaningful conclusion, no neat ribbon to tie up all the loose ends, to make my package prettier. but suffice it to say that i love you, Matt, and i'm feeling the hurt you couldn't share alive. you were gone far too young; a brilliant soul like yours should have outlasted the lot of us.

[ i thought of you and where you'd gone, and let the world spin madly on ]

winning.

this has got to be one of the fastest posts of all time, since i have to get some sleep ASAP (i have a dawnie lecture at 7:45 tomorrow morning for which i'll need to resurrect myself), but i don't want to neglect this here blog... so how about i share a little about how awesome i feel round about now?

hi there, everyone... my name is Hannah and i'm a happy bunny :)

this song kind-of embodies that... so give it a listen and feel happy of yourself. just do it!

later, lovelies!

a kid with a bullet soul.

i've always been sort-of... different. i didn't really click with most kids at school; i had friends, and they were fantastic, but i didn't completely fit in. and i honestly didn't mind. i've always liked being a little off-centre, just a tad left of frame.

and then i started university.

coming to Rhodes was like being confronted with a million other "me"s. everyone is so different! everyone has opinions! everyone LIKES being original; everyone LIKES being "separate". but here's the funny thing: we still want to be united in our separateness. we still want to be accepted, loved. we still want to belong. we're just a little more demanding than the mainstream crowd.

don't get me wrong, there are hordes of mainstreamers at Rhodes, too. and they're some of the most legendary people i've ever met. this isn't a post about exclusivity and how much cooler all the "tweaked" kids are... it's a post about how, ultimately, we have a heck of a lot in common with each other. we just don't like admitting it, that's all.

aaaaanyway... i was thinking about Switchfoot's song Bullet Soul today (thinking about it instead of listening to it, because i don't have it on my iPod. laaaame.) and just loving it more and more as i thought about the lyrics, got to what i think is the heart of them.

we rise and fall together

our hearts still beat below

you can't stand by forever

you're a kid with a bullet soul!

who is this song directed to? the "friction makers". the "sparks". and i think that's us; all of us. we're not here just to take a back seat. we're not here just to stand to one side. it's time for us to seriously stand up, launch a couple grenades of faith, fight with the bullet souls we've been given.

so what do you say?

are you ready to go?

oh, and hi there :)

it's (kiss me now) spring!

"as to me, I know of nothing else but miracles."

- Walt Whitman

spring has sprung in Grahamstown. joy abounds in my heart! :) with the 1st of September being the Southern hemisphere's "official" first day of spring, i decided to wear my brightest, most flowery dress. the weather obliged - it was beautifully sunny and warm today, which made me sing - both literally and, um, metaphorically. (can one sing metaphorically? i mean, can one? ah well, who knows...)

e.e. cummings is one of my favourite poets of all time, and i love his fervour for springtime. although he hailed from the Northern hemisphere, which meant that his spring began in April, i still love his spring poetry and the joy it instills! here's my absolute favourite spring poem by the man:

when faces called flowers float out of the ground

and breathing is wishing and wishing is having-

but keeping is downward and doubting and never

-it's april(yes,april;my darling)it's spring!

yes the pretty birds frolic as spry as can fly

yes the little fish gambol as glad as can be

(yes the mountains are dancing together)

when every leaf opens without any sound

and wishing is having and having is giving-

but keeping is doting and nothing and nonsense

-alive;we're alive,dear:it's(kiss me now)spring!

now the pretty birds hover so she and so he

now the little fish quiver so you and so i

(now the mountains are dancing,the mountains)

when more than was lost has been found has been found

and having is giving and giving is living-

but keeping is darkness and winter and cringing

-it's spring(all our night becomes day)o,it's spring!

all the pretty birds dive to the heart of the sky

all the little fish climb through the mind of the sea

(all the mountains are dancing;are dancing)

how beautiful and lovely is that? it makes my heart grin :) i love the concept of spring - the newness that is born out of the dead ground, the life; the smell of jasmine invading the air around me as i walk around campus; bird songs and mellow evenings. the promise of warmth to a world that has known such bitter coldness. the miracle of it all. it leaves me in awe :)

happy spring if you live in the Southern hemisphere, lovelies, and if you're up Northern way, hope you stay warm!

happiness is...

• beautiful weather
• a boyfriend with a kind heart and a nice car
• an amazing package in the post from a girl i adore
• great music
• rainbows!
• Top Deck chocolate
• environmental fashion shows
• my band's first gig
• lovely friends
• fun hair

aaaah... today is a good day :)

Happy Women's Day

today being the 9th of August - our national Women's Day here in the RSA - i'd like to take a minute or five to salute the amazing creatures who have made an impact on this world and have influenced me, as well as a (very) few of the beauties who have made themselves present in my life. cool? cool.

i thought it was particularly apt that on this day of all days, the res in which i live here at Rhodes - which is still presently nameless and goes by the provisional title "New Res 2" - had its final cast of votes for a permanent name. among a long list of inspirational people, three women's names got the most votes, and they were Fatima Meer, Rosa Parks and Miriam Makeba. (for the record, i voted for Fatima Meer. i want to be a Meer Cat, yo!) all three of these ladies did amazing amazing things. what a tribute, that we'd honour them today!

now, on a more personal note... here are a small number of the women i love, who have given me roots and wings. (aaaah, the cliches abound...)

my Gran, Jessica. Granny Jess. the bravest, most beautiful woman! i love love love her, and always will. it's been over two years since she died, but her strength and joy and faith are still such huge parts of my life; i'm so very grateful to have known her, loved her and learnt from her. thank you, Jesus, for Granny Jess :)

then i think i definitely need to honour my dear dear mom, Loreen. (and hello, this photo is the awesomeness!)

wow. i'm sorry if you think your mom is the coolest, because you're quite obviously mistaken. i couldn't have asked for a more amazing woman in my life - so full of love and strength and joy! she's one of my best friends and definitely one of my favourite people around. she is so incredible and filled with passion and enthusiasm and just... love. it flows over. what an absolute blessing in my life :)

and then... my sister, Sindi! oh, how i love this girl. is she not breathtakingly beautiful, first of all? secondly, can we discuss how she is patient, generous, passionate and wonderful? she is a role model, someone i look up to and admire; another of my very best friends; she gives amazing hugs and listens and loves. i basically adore her.

then, let's talk about these women... my homegirls, my honorary sisters. first off: Sarah Bear (farthest on the left) is such a blessing in my life :) she's strong and assertive, funny as heck, unconditionally caring and just totally beautiful in every single way. i don't think she knows how much i appreciate her, but it's A LOT - i can talk to her about pretty much anything, and i know that she'll listen and lovingly give advice or reason into whatever i'm going through.

and then - Robyn! (next to Sarah) or, as she likes to be known, Batman ;) what an absolute legend. i'm talking about creative, hilarious, extraordinary everything when i say Robyn. i love her passion about life and everything she embraces in her life. i love that she questions things, that she is loyal and beautiful and downright kicks ass. i love HER, basically, and i'm overjoyed to know her - DBZ junkie and Beatles fanatic and incredible woman that she is.

and last but not least... my Pamalam! the absolute beauty :) she's practically my sister; there is not a person in this world whom she can't make smile. i love her exuberance, her laughter, her happiness and listening and hugs. i love that she loves life, tackles it head on, sings and carries on. she's an absolute joy to be around; she exudes love and warmth.

there are so many other women whose praises i could sing; women whom i love, who have loved me and grown me and shaped me into this woman i am today, and the woman i am still becoming. but, um, i have no time... i should be working right now, truthfully, and i need to get back to the accumulating stack of things that need to be done. so, let it be known that to every woman out there who has made an impact on me -

i love you.

i cherish you and the contribution you've made in my life.

i am grateful for your existence, your fight, your heart.

thank you.

and happy Women's Day :)

next to me

hi, everybody... my name is Hannah, and i'm hopelessly enamoured of a certain someone. a certain someone named Chris.

he makes my heart do little somersaults of happiness.

he feeds me toffees.

he gives big, incredible hugs and likes to hold my hand.

he has eyes that pour forth kindness.

he doesn't mind when i leave hot tear stains all over his jersey during the sad parts of movies.

he loves my Jesus, too.

he is, in a word, wonderful.

and yes... i'm totally lovesick. bear with me, why don't you? here's a happy clappy romantic song for all of us! yay!

Next to Me by Sleeping At Last by sleepingatlast

...and now i'll go away with all my giddiness ;)

August awesomeness

hi there, everybody! :)

this is a random post to say... August is AMAZING so far. (and yes, i know it's only the 1st... and it's only just gone 1pm... but bear with me.)

i have quite honestly had the most beautiful day i've had in a long time, and it only promises to get better! so far:

• the sun is shining BEAUTIFULLY all around me (the weather has been kind of bratty lately, so sunshine is welcome and wonderful!) here's the view from out my window:


• there are lovely yellow daisies which have sprung up overnight all over the grass up on the hill, and they make me smile
• we had Prof Walters, only the most fabulous English lecturer, this morning for a lecture on The Great Gatsby... he played us period music, showed us cars of the age, showed us some of his incredible artistic talent and alluded to 1980s airline commercials. i was the only one who got the joke. SO COOL :)
• i sat with Michelle and had fun moaning about the Journ readings and remembering how good but sickening The Crucible is
• i met with Le Sister for some delicious hot chocolate (she had a cappuccino, but whatevs) from HomeGround, and we sat around and shared secrets and giggles and happiness
• we saw Mike and Laura and there was a pretty rainbow made of wires on the fun computerish thing Mike was carrying around! (wow, i sound pathetic. just ignore that whole point, please...)
• i saw a LOT of Natal registration plates on the cars parked around campus! which, um, made me happy. don't ask why. can't explain.
• the councillor for our area totally greeted me this morning. from his car. he comes to my church. i believe this is awesome.
• CHICKEN PIES for lunch! hi, best meal that the dining hall serves. i am so pleased to eat you. YES.
• Mr Hattingh sat at our table, and Robyn went off on tangents, and lunch was brilliant :)

and why is the rest of the day going to be beautiful? well, i'm off to book Harry Potter Tickets in just over an hour, and then i'll do some work... (admittedly NOT that fun, but hey...) and THEN, after dinner, i'm going to go listen to a former NASA guy talk about his coolness, and THEN, after that talk, we're all going down to watch HARRY POTTER! woot :)

how are you, lovelies? i hope the sun is shining down on you, too! and here's to the rest of August - let it be just as magnificent :)

why weddings win

'sup, homies?

i'm back at varsity now, getting into the swing of things and loving life. but i realised i never gave you an update on the wedding that we went to nearly two weeks ago... and it was a wedding to remember, so i thought i'd share it with you :)

my family has this very cool guy that is our collective friend. he used to live in Lil' Hometown and worked with my dad; he was a part of our church and a part of our lives. dear Neville :) he moved away three or four years ago, and sometime last year he met the beautiful Joanne. hi, soulmates! we had never met her before the wedding, but it was evident from the moment we saw the two of them together that this was something incredibly special.

i didn't get many photos, because i was too busy oohing and aahing at all the specialness... but i've hijacked some of my friend Sakkie's photos and pimped them up (ie. put them through Poladroid...) and i will now display them here for you to see :) ready?

for the ceremony, i sat with friend John. we intended to have all four of the "kids" - my sister, me, John and his brother Joe - all sitting together, but things got out of whack and John and i ended up being the only kids....

...and apparently for good cause ;) i love how absolutely ridiculous we both look in these photos. love it.

and then...

here's the moment i was talking about. what a stunning thing to see :)

the rest of the ceremony was just as gorgeous, just as moving. and then... it was RECEPTION TIME ;)

all the Eshowe people were put at one table - i like to think of it as Nev's "Eshowe family".

the cake... and many delicious cupcakes! yes!

we decided to have a "photoshoot" outside, and these are the results:

and there you have it... a taste of the wonderful wedding that was!

i think marriage is such a beautiful, powerful thing; i pray that Nev and Jo are amazingly blessed in their new life together...

and i pray, too, for the man i will someday marry.

♥♥♥

wantness.

"you don't need most of what you have. you don't need more."

- roanck

truer words might never have been spoken. i'm trying desperately not to spend money unnecessarily lately; i can be such a ridiculously careless spender if i don't watch myself.

but a small dose of ModCloth wishing never hurt anyone, right? ;)

i figure i'll never actually work up the nerve to actually purchase anything from ModCloth, since i'm terrified of online shopping. not to mention that what i order will probably never make it to me. *cue scathing rant about South Africa's postal service, which isn't actually half as bad as everyone makes it out to be* also, ModCloth's prices verge on the ridiculous. so i will keep dreaming... and i will share all the glorious goodness i have stumbled across recently with you :)

yes, ModCloth... i love you.

in other news, i'm safely back in Lil' Varsity Hometown, catching up with life and some things which must be done before term begins on Monday.

stay tuned for updates on my life, including my family's epic cross-province roadtrip (which we undertook during a petrol strike, heightening the stakes and making life fun) and the really incredible wedding of dear friend Neville to his beautiful Joanne :)

until next time, dear readers, keep well...

and just in case you didn't know -

edited to add:

i've been hanging out with Sindi and her computer whizz friends this afternoon, making me feel incredibly inadequate (no... really.) so i decided to be, um, as geeky as i CAN... and i created a new button for this here blog :) here she is:

pretty, no? i am a leetle bit proud :) if you want one to stick on your blog or page or whatever, just grab the link in the little text box over to the right and *VOILA!* ...she is yours.

KBYE!